Monday, February 1, 2010

A Happy Sort of Relationship

An acquaintance recently told me that February is the ‘month of love’. I innocently asked, “Shouldn’t every month be one of love?” She glowered at me as if I’d coughed up a hair ball. It got me thinking, though, about love, relationships, significant others, and so forth, and made me realize just how easy it is for people to place extremely high expectations on their beloved, and how easy it is for them to display an incredible amount of disrespect toward him or her.

So, I’ve devised a little list of helpful hints for insuring a positive and loving relationship with your honey:

1. Look the part – It pains me to witness someone who uses marriage as an excuse to let herself go. That special someone deserves to see you at your best, even during those lovely, lazy days spent at home. Trade in those oversized sweat pants for a good pair of jeans or trousers of the yoga-variety. Wear a fitted T-shirt instead of his old work shirt. Put on a little lipstick before he gets home from work. Watch your weight (he certainly is). You might find that he’ll be less likely to let himself go if you remain hot and happening.

2. Do your thing, so long as it doesn’t become a thing – We all need outlets and hobbies away from our beloved. Do make sure that she is on board with what you like to do. Harmless cross-dressing is one thing; smoking crack is quite another. Never allow your thing to come between you and your darling. It really boils down to respect for her feelings.

3. In sickness and in health – even if your turtle-dove is a raging hypochondriac, you must take his health concerns to heart and offer support in any way you can. Never pooh-pooh his aches, pains, or moods (Side note: if he bemoans aches and pains every day, or seems to be in some sort of mental funk, realize it may be a symptom of something deeper, and talk it over with him)

4. Avoid trash-talk – I’m incredibly bothered when someone badmouths his better-half. A little kidding around about her predilections is one thing; constantly complaining about every little thing she does is not. In business, we’re taught that if we have an issue with a colleague, we should take it up with that colleague before running to management or other co-workers. Shouldn’t the same rule apply to marriage?

5. The Golden Rule – when it comes right down to it, we must focus on treating our spouse/significant other/longtime companion the way in which we’d like to be treated. Don’t expect to be treated like a queen if you treat your beloved like a commoner. What goes around comes around.

Let’s make every month/day/hour/minute/second about love, shall we?

Beth Newman
Image Consultant/Life Coach
Look, feel, and LIVE your absolute best!

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